I took a deep breath. “Not really. I tend to stay really busy. Especially as of late.” Unfortunately, it was true. “Why do you ask?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. Curiosity, I guess… I found your condoms in your overnight bag. Did you know they have an expiration date?”
“I did, but I don’t think-”
“They expired last November.”
I raised an eyebrow. “No shit?” Well that’s embarrassing.
She nodded, smirking. “So I take that to mean Big Brother hasn’t been getting any?”
I rolled my eyes, sighing, “Nope.”
“Not even from the models?”
“Mm-mm,” I replied. “I mean don’t get me wrong, I’ve tried, but I don’t know what it is. Kinda in a slump but at least my work keeps me distracted.”
Kelly nodded. “I hear ya there.”
“Really?”
“Yup,” she said. “Been focusing on school so much that I haven’t had the chance to go out and meet some boys.” She chuckled, “It’s funny, because sometimes I’ll watch a movie or read a story or stumble upon something dirty online and I’m like BAM, instantly horny. So I’ll either go downstairs and work, or work on my downstairs,” she said with a wink. “Some of the stuff mom wore today was created in a fiery urge to fuck.”
If I had been drinking something, I would have spit it out right then and there… for the second time today. Kelly didn’t seem fazed.
“I’m surprised Dad hasn’t wondered why we go through so many batteries these days.” Her eyes focused on nothing as she picked up her dill pickle and took a crisp bite. “So Big Bro, how long has it been?” she said, turning her attention to me.
I tilted my head. “Since my last…”
“Bonin’,” she smiled.
I took a deep breath, eyes looking to the ceiling as I traced back my memory. “Probably over a year.” I brought my gaze back to her. “You?”
“Close to the same, give or take a week. I stopped counting after six months.”
I laughed. “What a sad bunch we both are.”
“I know, right?” she responded. “I guess it’s good that you don’t shoot nudes or you’d probably have a heart attack. Been a while since you saw a vah-jay-jay,” she teased.
Then her eyes narrowed as she scrunched her nose and smiled.
“It’s too bad.”
“What?”
A mischievous sparkle twinkled in her eye. “It’s too bad you didn’t get to see my handy work with Mom. Would have fixed that problem right away.”
I set my glass down. “Man, Kelly, what is your obsession with getting me to see Mom’s… business?”
“I’m not obsessed!” she said. “I’ve barely even brought it up.”
“The fact that you’ve brought it up is bizarre enough on its own.” I laughed. “And, you’ve brought it up twice now.” I said raising two fingers.
“Have I?” She leaned back in her chair. “You’re probably right. I don’t know why it’s on my mind still,” she said with a shrug. “It was just so cool. I’ve never studied another vagina besides my own before. I mean it was different, but also very similar to my own.” Her hand unconsciously traveled to her crotch, giving it a light squeeze. “Oh my gosh it sounds so dirty!” she giggled, “I’m so bad.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Sounds to me like you are thinking of pitching for the other team.”